Posts Tagged ‘Bruce Campbell

08
Oct
09

After Injuries, Offense is Running Uphill

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So the Terps’ top running back, Da’rel Scott, is out until at least Nov. 21 with a broken arm. Left tackle and o-line anchor Bruce Campbell, who has already missed half of the team’s games so far, may or may not be out against Wake with a knee. Injury.

Davin Meggett is OK as the starting RB, but he only got 27 yards against Clemson. Paul Pinegar would be OK at left tackle, but, well, he’s not Bruce Campbell.

Hopefully, the defense is rounding into form. With Torrey Smith (18th nationally in receiving yards) and company along the sidelines, the passing game doesn’t figure to stay down for long stretches. And with Smith (second nationally in all-purpose yards) handling returns and Nick “The Junior Kick” Ferrara playing the one-man band on the special teams, I’m sure that unit will continue to be solid, not to mention highly inspirational.

That leaves the running game hanging out there like Anthony Munoz’s retarded pinkie finger. According to this Post article, the Terps had 28 rushing yards in the Rutgers loss, and rank 100th nationally in rushing offense. The RBs have only scored five TDs this year, and Scott had three of those. I’m no Vince Cromartie, but when you SUBTRACT two of your best pieces from a unit that you already needed three numbers to rank, that may NOT be the spark you were hoping for. The Post article also states that, deep in the final quarter on Saturday, on a big fourth down (which Maryland converted), Coach Friedgen “wavered before deciding the offensive line could indeed stand up to Clemson’s athletic defensive front and help the Terrapins get six inches.” First of all, six inches. Second of all, it’s never a compliment when you hear “THAT is a unit you can really waver on.”

It will be interesting to see how they do against a fair-to-middlin Wake rushing defense. And we could see redshirt freshman Gary Douglas (21 yards against Clemson) get significant time, which would be interesting. Report on him is that he’s athletic enough, but not overly predisposed to the tough runs and the trench work. With the O-line still struggling, he could be called on to do plenty of the ugly stuff. As always….we shall see….between the white lines.

(Photo credit: Washington Times)

25
Sep
09

A Rutgers-Maryland preview from the late Michael Jackson

michael_jackson_031605Hello.  I’m Michael Jackson.  The entertainer?   I recently passed away very quietly after a long bout with vampirism and hospital-grade anesthesia.  What?  Is that weird?  I don’t think so.  I think dying is very sweet.  Very charming.  And now I’m back!  To spread a message of hope. And to handicap the Rutgers-Maryland game.

You didn’t know I was a football fan?  I love football; it makes you wish, and dream.  It provides a break from reality…sometimes I really needed that. Can’t you just picture me on a Saturday afternoon, lounging on my $750,000 rainbow-colored hippopotamus couch, a plate of corn dogs in one hand, ice cold glass of bat milk in the other?  That’s a good lunch for me.

For the Maryland-Rutgers game, lots of weird parallels. It’s like Maryland holds up their hand in the mirror, and there’s Rutgers, and they’re waving, but at the same time, and they’re perfectly aligned!  You know?  No?  Shamon over here and I’ll show you. First of all, both teams lost big in their openers–Rutgers lost to Cincinnati 47-15, and we all know about the Terps. Hee hee! But Rutgers is 2-1 now, while Maryland is 1-2. Both teams gamble with blitz-happy defenses, but the Rutgers defense locked down after its loss, surrendering just 22 points to Howard and FIU, while the Terps have surrendered approximately 822 points.   Both have a two-headed RB monster — Joe Martinek and Jourdan Brooks for Rutgers, Scott and Meggett for the Terps. Rutgers starts an unproven freshman at QB (although he might be injured), and Maryland starts an unproven senior (just kidding Chris — a-HEE HEE!).

Even their stadium situations are eerily similar in an Opposite Day kind of way (Yaaay! I LOVE, I mean, I HATE Opposite Day!). Maryland’s ticket problems in its newly expanded stadium are well documented, but meanwhile Rutgers is packing its newly expanded stadium.  It’s cra-zee!  Almost as crazy as that Bubbles thing. Want to know a secret?  There was no such thing as Bubbles. He wasn’t real!  It was just some chimpanzee that I was having intercourse with. Sexual intercourse.

Bottom line:  it’s a broken record for the Terps — and I should know about breaking records. If Maryland can get its O-line and running game working, they have a chance. If Torrey Smith can light up star CB Devon McCoury like a jheri curl on a Pepsi shoot, they have a chance. If Bruce Campbell returns at left tackle and can help slow down pass rush specialist Jonathan Freeny (Dwight’s second cousin), they have a chance.  If they can play mistake-free, they have a chance.

But as with Billie Jean’s paternity suit, there are many ifs. And I don’t see that Maryland’s home field advantage is as strong as in years past. I would rank it behind the home field advantage I enjoyed at Neverland, although I had wine and special locks and Ferris wheels and wishing trees and hospital-grade anesthesia. As previously mentioned. Wheeee! Sorry, Terps, but I love my Scarlet Knights. But do not be melancholy.  I love you all forever.

Love always,
Michael.

Prediction:  Rutgers 27, Maryland 16

18
Sep
09

A Maryland-MTSU preview from President Barack Obama

obama-superman Good afternoon. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you. You know, just yesterday I had a chance to visit with a few folks out at the Comcast Center.  Doin’ a great job over there. And while I’m here in Terp country, I wanted to talk for a moment about the true cornerstone of my presidency: sports predictions. So.  Let me take this opportunity — to — share some thoughts — on tomorrow’s — game.

Look.  You may recall that Middle Tennessee State upset the Terps last year in Murfreesboro — a city in which — I imagine — I am not welcome.

But I don’t wish to discuss the divisive politics of the past.  I wish to discuss Dwight Dasher, the MTSU quarterback — who does it all.  Literally.  He accounts for 80 percent of the offense and more than half of their all-purpose yards. Philip Tanner, their running back, is out for this game.  But no matter.  Because Dasher leads the team in rushing yards with 193, along with 435 passing yards. I’m sure that if Dasher could throw the football — to himself — he would also — lead the team — in — receiving.

Now.  Make no mistake. Maryland is experiencing some adversity.  Instead of left tackle Bruce Campbell, who is a mountain of a man, we have Paul Pinegar, whose last name — rhymes — with “vinegar.”  Instead of safety Jamari McCulloch, we have Eric Franklin. Instead of cornerback Nolan Carroll, who is — the team’s — fourth-leading tackler — we have Cameron Chism.  At least Nolan will be tossing the coin to start the game. In a similarly empty gesture of conciliation, I have asked my staff to consider Nolan as the nation’s first Czar of Tibular Health. He will be the first person to ever hold this office. No one — no one –will ever be able to take that away from him.

Look. It is all going to come down, once again, to the lines for this Maryland team. No one in this country should ever have to be embarrassed on television just because they cannot hold a block or wrap up a running back. And if they don’t come together as one, I fear that the Terps — could be ripe — for another — embarrassing — day.  But in the end, MTSU will be susceptible to the Terps’ attack. Under Chris Turner’s leadership, these Terps have always risen — off the mat — in times of need.

So. With all due respect to the Blue Raiders, I will select the Terrapins for the victory today. And this is despite my trepidation. I would not be the first president to witness a Middle Tennessee State victory over the Terps, but with any luck — I will be the last. Thank you. God bless you. And may God bless the Terrapins of the University of Maryland.

Prediction: Maryland 24, MTSU 16

11
Aug
09

haiku for bruce campbell

At 6'6" 306lbs, Campbell can bench press 490lbs and lift other large objects.

At 6'6" 306lbs, Campbell can bench press 490lbs and lift other large objects.

You are a Greek God.

Protect our quarterback with

your enormous pecs.




Photobucket
badge/terps.win.jpg

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