If we lose to Duke in football I’m gonna flip my sh*t


Yesterday Patrick Stevens noted that Duke is favored to beat Maryland this Saturday in Durham.

This is only the tenth time that Duke has been favored in any ACC game since 1995. Please re-read that sentence.

Duke is favored by eight points. EIGHT POINTS.

Duke is coming off a bye week in which they were hoping to improve their offensive line and running game. Sound familiar? But here’s a key difference: behind quarterback Thaddeus Lewis, who already holds several school records, Duke leads the ACC in passing offense with 314 yards and 2.6 touchdowns per game. Dear Anthony Wiseman: please wear your good shoes this Saturday.

But none of this matters. This is still football season, and Duke is still Duke. Maryland cannot lose to Duke in football. If the Terps lose to Duke this Saturday, I’m gonna flip out. And I don’t toss that phrase around lightly. I am going to FLIP. MY. SHIT. I might run somebody over with my car. That would be kinda neat. Wheeee! Bottom line: if the Terps give those white-bread elitist Titanic-reenacting Nancy Boys another reason to smirk at me during cocktail parties, I’m gonna lose it all over this Internet. Fair warning.

(Photo credit: Deadspin)


1 Response to “If we lose to Duke in football I’m gonna flip my sh*t”

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