Archive for August, 2008


on the half shell: maryland vs delaware

YES!  What a win.  Maryland is 1-0 baby!  What a great start to the 2008 season.

What you saw today was Maryland role players performing their roles.  Da’Rel Scott rolled off 26 carries for 197 yards and looked virtually unstoppable out there.  Steffy, the “game manager”, kept the offense steady, going 10/18.  He did throw a couple picks, but did not have any game changing turnovers.  Darrius Heyward-Bey continued to live-up to the pro hype with 90 total yards and a touchdown, including a sweet 36-yard reception.  My boy Davin Meggett started his Terrapin career off with a solid effort that included a score.  All-around it was a solid offensive showing, especially considering this was basically a preseason game.

The defense was stout, holding a quality Delaware team to 249 total yards, and shutting them out until the fourth quarter.  Defensive back Kevin Barnes started the year off right with an interception.  The Terps kept the Blue Hens on their side of the field for most of the game and dominated at the line.

Delaware might be D-II, but as we heard repeatedly throughout the broadcast they are one of the powerhouse D-II  programs.  Delaware has played the Terps evenly throughout the history of this border state rivalry.  They are no joke, and this Terrapin team took the task seriously to produce a win.

The Terps are undefeated.  At this point, all signs point toward a winning season.  GO TERPS!


quarterbacks are people too

Every once in awhile I’ll read an article that actually changes my opinion on an athlete. After reading Eric Prisbell’s update on Jordan Steffy in today’s Post, I must say I have a bit more sympathy for Steffy. You’ll recall that Steffy took an illegal helmet-to-helmet hit in a game against Rutgers last September. Rutgers is known as one of the dirtiest shit talking schools in the country, and there was great speculation that the hit was intentional and called for by the coaching staff to knock Steffy out of the game. Steffy suffered a severe concussion from the hit and missed most of the season, only to return for a few possessions in October.

It has been almost a year since the hit and Steffy is just getting back to 100%. His concussion was not the run of the mill seeing stars kind. For the last year Steffy suffered through severe headaches and memory loss. Reading this article today made me remember that a) Steffy is just a 22-year old kid, b) This sort of injury can be both mentally and physically devastating, and c) It took a lot of guts for him to get back on the field.

For once I’m going to change my stripes. After criticizing him for the last three years, I’ll be pulling for Jordan Steffy today. His talent and character have never been in doubt, but he’s never been on the field long enough to reach full potential. I have a lot of respect for a young guy that can man-up and make it back after suffering a big setback. Every new season is a clean slate. I’d love to see Steffy reach his full potential on the field in his senior year.


There Will Be Previews: A Delaware Football Analysis from Mr. Daniel Plainview

Ladies and gentlemen?  Ladies and gentlemen.  Thank you all so much for visiting with us this morning.  Now, I trust that you all have heard some of the more, shall we say, extravagant rumors about this preview.  But this is the face!  No great mystery.

I like to think of myself as a football man.  I have a team in California producing at five touchdowns a week.  And those men work for me.  They don’t go losing their helmets on the gridiron or leaving the field before the game is complete.  So, ladies and gentlemen, when I say that I’m a football man, you will agree.

Now, as a football man, I’m better at drawing up plays in the dirt than making speeches, so I hope you’ll forgive just good old-fashioned plain speaking.   I recently traveled up Interstatial Road number 95 to see about these Delaware Blue Hens that are the first opponent of the Terrapins football team this 2008 season.  I have to say they seem a stout lot.  They love fresh air and hunting for seeds. They have an old rivalry with the Terps, much as the boys at Standard have a bone to pick with Union Oil. And speaking of rivalries, there seems to be a bit of controversy at quarterback, whereby Ohio State transfer Rob Schoenhoft and redshirt freshman Lou Ritacco are squaring off, and no one will know the winner until the Blue Hens take the field on the morrow!

Now, ladies and gentleman, Delaware finished in second position in Division 1-AA last year. They have a novel offense and are long on razzle-dazzle. So you know that when it comes to the showdown, they’ll be there.

But what to make of the game tomorrow?  Delaware’s got moxie, to be certain, but that’s not to say that when they face off against Maryland, there won’t be guts, or ichor, or red stuff. Because there will be those things.  Because Division 1-AA is just the…afterbirth. So let me propose it to you this way, Blue Hens. Let’s say you have a milkshake. And I am Maryland, and I have a milkshake! And I have a straw, here it is! And my straw reaches acrooooooooooossss the room, to your milkshake. I…Drink…Your….Milkshake!!! I drink it up! SSSSSSSZZZZZZZHHHHHHHHHLLLLLRRRRRRRRPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!

I’m finished!

Prediction: Maryland 45, Delaware 17


All-time favorite Terp football things (and season prediction)

There is no time for American sports fans like the present, when once again blows the crisp wind from o’er the sea, and the towering Soveriegn Football ascends his autumnal throooooooooonnnnne. Who, this season, will answer the Legends’ Call? Only between the white lines of gridiron battle can true heroes be fooorrrrrrrrmmmmmed.

We’ll do whatever it takes to actually get excited for this Maryland football season. One way to do that is to type out old-school hard-ass phrases and recite them in a John Facenda voice, preferably while crouching behind the old abandoned fax machine in the scary part of the office hallway. Another is to forget that this year’s Terp teams looks utterly pedestrian by recalling some of the greatest moments of seasons past….when the rubbing of Testudo’s noooooose was a signal…that Terrapin Domination, and Glory for aaaaaalllllll, was imminent.

So here are some of my personal Terp football favorites, along with my season prediction:

1) Favorite season:

1953 — National Championship Team. We had Jack Scarbath AND Shoo-Shoo Shemonski. On the same team. How were we not going all the way? And everyone knew it, too. That was the best part. We just got demonic on people.

Shoo-Shoo Shemonski (and I’m not kidding) high-steps to another score. Now now, simmer down, Shoo-Shoo! Save some for the sock hop!

2) Favorite Individual Player:

Lamont Jordan. Wish he’d been on some better teams, but people forget he was a one-man gang for the Terps. Merriman’s a close second.

3) Favorite Single Game:

I was at this one:

4) Favorite Tailgate Lot:

Lot 2. Why, is there another one?

5) 2008 Season Predictions:

7-5, a loss on the blue fields of Boise at the Roady’s Humanitarian Bowl. Yee-ha!



One of ESPN ACC blogger Heather Dinich’s “Five Things To Watch” in the upcoming hoops season:

• Maryland’s partnership with the NIT
Get used to it. With an unfavorable schedule that includes playing Miami, Duke and North Carolina two times each, the chances are good the Terps will be back at the NIT for the fourth time in five seasons.

I don’t even have a comeback, Heather. You’ve just got me all melancholy now.

full article


the terps field hockey team begins another run at greatness

Let's go girls!

The Maryland field hockey team begins their 2008 campaign with an exhibition against Junior F.C. Spain in College Park this evening. Did you know that the Terps have one of the dominant programs in NCAA field hockey history? NO? Well, here are some other things you did not know about Terps field hockey:

  • The Terps have won five Division-I National Championships since it became an official D-I sport in 1981
  • UMD won it all in 2005 and 2006 before failing to reach the semi’s last year for the first time in five years
  • Maryland has won six ACC titles and has been to the NCAA tournament twenty times in twenty-six years
  • The ACC is the dominant conference in field hockey – UMD (5), UNC (5), and Wake Forest (3) account for 13 of 26 D-I championships in history

The Terps finished last year at #3 in the final D-I Coaches Poll, only behind #1 UNC and #2 Wake Forest. This year, key stops on the road to the championship include early out-of-conference tests on 9/1 at Penn State, 9/5 against ODU, and 9/7 at Michigan. They round out their tough schedule with BC at home on 9/20, a trip to Wake Forest on 9/27, a rematch at ODU on 10/17, and UNC at home on 10/25. Did I mention that Duke finished last year at #12? I think we need to bring the ruckus and watch them beat the shin guards off those Duke bitches at 1PM on 10/11. Fuck Duke.

Coach Missy Meharg has been with the team over twenty years and is largely responsible for the its history of success. The Terrapins return most of the core members of its squad this year. Key players include All-American sophomore forward Katie O’Donnell, who led the nation in PPG last year, and All-American senior back Susie Rowe.

In summary, the UMD field hockey team is no joke, so I’m not going to make any tongue-in-cheek references about how good they look in their skirts. I’m only going to make serious references about them. Do you see that picture at the top of the post? Those girls have seriously nice asses. So start chanting “EVERY CORNER IS A GOAL” and get it up for Terps field hockey!


I hope Leo brings his girlfriend

For the Terps defense this year, there’s good news, and there’s bad news.  Which do you want first?   How about the bad news…the bad news is they aren’t going to be very good.  As always, there are stud linebackers (Dave Philistin, with Adrian Moten on deck), but after that, it’s kind of bleak. 

The good news, however, is that the Leo position is now a regular thing. Some might say that the Leo position is a very enticing one. If you get my drift. Delightfully devilish. I’d like to score a touchdown from the Leo position. Although chances of that are slim, seeing as it’s a defensive position.

Was I talking about something? Oh, right, so the Leo position, to be played this year by seniors Trey “Save Tonight” Covington and Rick “You’re My Butterfly” Costa, is a “hybrid” position between linebacker and defensive lineman. It seems designed to give the D more flexibility to showcase their strengths (LBs) or mask their weaknesses (run stopping), depending on how you look at it. We’ll see how it goes. My personal feeling is that they created this position because they wanted to use the word “hybrid,” which is the early favorite for this season’s overused buzzword or phrase, replacing last season’s “put a hat on the ball.” I think that in general, people just want to sound cool by saying they have something that is a “hybrid.” For instance, this chewing gum that I have, it’s really a hybrid substance, somewhere between candy and mouthwash. My shoes are not brown…they are a green and red hybrid. It’s going to be everywhere before too long…hybrid is the next “synergy.” I think people should really be taking a proactive approach on this.


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August 2008